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Saturday, July 31, 2010

I CAN’T GIVE YOU A GRID REFERENCE, BUT…

For Writers Island prompt #14 2010 The Journey
And One Single Impression - Cocoon
And Monday Poetry Train Revisited


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The Jasmine-like (though much more intense) fragrance of the ดอกราตรี (Dok Ratree - Deep Night Bloom), fills the air throughout the cooler nights of Dec-Feb, when it flowers.














Downwind of the Deep Night bloom
that doesn’t love the heat
of a summer afternoon
preferring instead the dead
of night at cooler times
when thoughts turn the other way
to those that come from upstream
of the swollen river bed
fed by the flash flood falls
that form from the overfill
of underground reservoirs
high on the mountainside
as the valley mist rolls low
obscuring the silhouette
on the eastern underscore
till dawn when the rising sun
chases the fallen shroud
back to the space between
its golden glow and the earth
that harbours its one night stand
tolerates its presence
welcomes with open arms
its life-sustaining moisture
before showing it the door
in order to allow
thoughts of the Deep Night bloom
and those that come from upstream
of the swollen river bed
to conjugate and bear fruit
of morning mountain slopes
that tastes of distant dreams
and hopes and fears and thoughts
of men and women who
inhale the fragrant air
of the valley veiled in mist
that descends with the setting sun
on evenings such as this
when the Deep Night bloom awakes

52 comments:

  1. Stan this is a really beautiful poem. It describes a journey both external and internal. It fills the senses both physical and of the inner landscape. Back and forth from daylight to moonshine. I can't say enough. It's just a beautiful poem. And thank you,

    Elizabeth

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  2. Thanks Elizabeth; The fragrance that comes from the blooms can be quite overwhelming at times; intoxicating. I've been wanting to write about it for a while, but just got the chance to spend some time thinking about it yesterday.

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  3. I should like to read this poem again and again. Already, 3 times, and I'm finding something new each time. Thank you for your original and enlightening thoughts.

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  4. Thanks ViV; I wrote the first line and a continuos flow of thoughts just came to me. It's actually a single sentence, of exactly 200 words... if I counted up correctly.

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  5. Hi stan interesting blog, i will visit ur blog very often, hope u go for this website to increase visitor.Happy Blogging!!!

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  6. Thanks Maria; The more, the merrier.

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  7. Stan, I love reading your view of the world. It is indeed a beautiful and poignant poem!

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  8. Thanks Diane; I try to say what I see, but sometimes I think about what I see, and say what I think about.

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  9. I enjoyed the entire poem, Stan, but I really liked the ending and thinking about the men and women inhaling the fragrant air.

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  10. Stan an absolutely beautiful piece of work!
    Pamela

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  11. This carried me along like the scent of a beautiful bloom on the evening breeze. In other words...I liked it! :)

    b

    http://itcrossedmymindblog.blogspot.com/2010/07/journeywhat-if.html

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  12. Lovely, peaceful journey comes full circle ...

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  13. Thanks to:
    Mary; It's certainly a refreshing change from the humidity we have to suck on most of the year.
    Pamela; One of those that just wrote itself - just two lines edited from first draft.
    B: If I could bottle that smell...

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  14. Thanks Marianne; The cooler it gets, the more powerful the aroma.

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  15. This was very beautifully written! Great post!

    -Weasel

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  16. great journey Stan and nicely written

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  17. Thanks to:
    Weasel; Ode to an odour...? :)
    Wayne; Some journeys don't involve travelling.

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  18. Wow! This is like enjoying the making of a colourful painting! Enjoying the journey of the artist as he paints a dramatic world of sights and even scents!

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  19. Thanks GT; Fragrances often evoke thoughts and memories, stimulating all the senses.

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  20. the things that go on in ones sleep, ones dreams, the unconscious rising to the surface. You have said this in such a wonderful way!

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  21. Thanks Tammie; The world that surrounds us inspires all our dreams and ambitions.

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  22. Thanks Gautami; I got a bit wrapped up in it.

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  23. This had everything - imagery, atmosphere, great lines, and I loved the ending.

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  24. Thanks Anthonty; Sometimes differences of opinion, give birth to fresh ideas, rather than merely settling for compromise.

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  25. Very nice imagery in your poem. It grabbed me at the beginning and pulled me into your journey.

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  26. of morning mountain slopes
    that tastes of distant dreams
    and hopes and fears and thoughts

    Love these beautiful lines! The whole poem has a wonderful flow to it.

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  27. Stan, This is lush. I really love this piece. My yearning to smell the deep night bloom grew intensely each time I read this. Bravo!

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  28. Thanks to:
    Loch Rob; Glad you went with it.
    Linda; Just wanted to share the feeling...
    Brenda; Smell it once - you'll never forget..

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  29. Beautiful! totally<3

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  30. its golden glow and the earth
    that harbours its one night stand
    tolerates its presence
    welcomes with open arms
    its life-sustaining moisture
    before showing it the door
    in order to allow
    thoughts of the Deep Night bloom

    Loved these lines.. just mesmerising.. I got lost..well done dear!

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  31. Thanks to:
    Touchy; I've tried to write about it previously, but this time it seemed to work.
    Claudia; it's quite an unforgettable experience to breathe in the fragrance at the dead of night.
    Riika; Six months on the scent still lingers - mentally.
    Ramesh; In the morning yo'll find your way.

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  32. I loved your repetition of 'Downwind of the Deep Night bloom' and the mention of the originating reservoir. And these lines are my favorites:

    'as the valley mist rolls low
    obscuring the silhouette
    on the eastern underscore
    till dawn when the rising sun
    chases the fallen shroud
    back to the space between
    its golden glow and the earth'

    Delectable.

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  33. Thanks Julia; I started with the fragrance, and the play on downwind and upstream.

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  34. Wow- that poem is amazing! I love all the imagery and I can almost smell the jasmine!

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  35. Thanks Patti; I think the bloom must be related to Jasmine. Just imagine it 10 times more concentrated.

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  36. thank you for the mention of a continuous 200 word sentence b/c thaz exactly what i thought... the continuity and pace was just as it should be as we traveled along with you....

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  37. I actually have nothing to say. Just a sense of peace.

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  38. Thanks to:
    One more believer; I was hoping so.
    Sandy; I'm glad it does that for you.

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  39. Hi Stan...just a note here. I enjoy your blog so much and your reciprocal comments so much as well, but for the moment I am going to have my poetry blog open only to readers I know...which would mean, of course, all the poets! I looked for your email address to send you an invite so you would be on that list so you can read my blog, but I cannot find it. So if you could send me your email address at my address: dixibear@aol.com I would put you on the list. I would do nothing else with your addresss. And you can get rid of this comment as well, if you wish...once you read it. Regards, Mary

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  40. loved reading this .. so serene setting :)

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  41. Thanks to:
    Mary; Coming up...
    Nimue; You'd love it...

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  42. Thanks Jingle; Great fragrance.

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  43. Thanks Tumblewords; Must be something in the air.

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  44. This is cool Dad. I love that smell.

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  45. Thanks Changnoi; My first 50-er.

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  46. Primal. Intoxicating. The language of water, the topography of dreams. Fragrance of Deep Night bloom lingers...

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  47. Thanks Gabrielle; That sums it up nicely.

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