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Saturday, March 23, 2013

WHIRL #101

For Sunday Whirl: Hurry, Across, Forgotten, Country, Jar,
Disguised, Wound, Yesterday, Stirred, Mind, Tree, Sand

INNOCENCE LOST



Hurry across
forgotten country,
jar memories
that disguised the wound
of yesterday;
stirred a stubborn mind...
conjured tree houses,
beaches, sand castles...
Posted by at

45 comments:

  1. veronicaMarch 24, 2013 at 4:27 PM

    Sweet.And short. And to the point. I like it. :)

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  2. Dr. Pearl Ketover Prilik (PKP)March 24, 2013 at 6:29 PM

    very much enjoyed the image of stirring a "stubborn mind" - :)

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  3. UnknownMarch 24, 2013 at 6:31 PM

    So concise - I can never do that with the wordle words! A stubborn mind can create many wounds.

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  4. AnonymousMarch 24, 2013 at 7:31 PM

    Great antidote!

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  5. Magical Mystical TeacherMarch 24, 2013 at 7:52 PM

    A true economy of words, nothing wasted!

    A Dozen Whirls

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  6. vivinfranceMarch 24, 2013 at 8:20 PM

    conjured happy memories in my mind.

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  7. AnonymousMarch 24, 2013 at 9:22 PM

    I love when the words work with minimal addition. I also like your speaker's admonition to deliberately 'jar' memories, good and bad.

    Your close up elephant is enchanting.

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  8. AnonymousMarch 24, 2013 at 9:33 PM

    I always enjoy economy of words. I like your use of conjured and jar memories.

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  9. AnonymousMarch 24, 2013 at 10:47 PM

    Very concise and stubborn minds hide a lot of wounds,

    Elizabeth

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  10. brenda wMarch 24, 2013 at 10:55 PM

    Your piece ripples out in echoes of the origin piece for the words. It's strong and concise.

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  11. Jae RoseMarch 24, 2013 at 10:55 PM

    A stubborn mind often forgets the good things..i am glad those tree houses and sandcastles came back..

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  12. teriMarch 25, 2013 at 12:43 AM

    How many times do we end up back in the country of jars? Stubbornness and hurry could be to blame. But I am not so sure anymore. Great write.

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  13. annell4March 25, 2013 at 2:43 AM

    Wonderfully done with so few words!!!

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  14. JulesMarch 25, 2013 at 3:57 AM

    It is amazing how concise one can be and still tell a story.

    Thanks for your visit :)

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  15. MarianneMarch 25, 2013 at 7:03 AM

    Brilliant use of the words, Stan! Short and so succinct!

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  16. AnonymousMarch 25, 2013 at 8:10 AM

    contemplative. brilliant! i think of someone caught in another country in
    their own mind.

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  17. Old EggMarch 25, 2013 at 9:42 AM

    What a great effort only 22 words in total! Is that your best achievement so far?

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  18. Veronica RothMarch 25, 2013 at 10:19 AM

    Really well done Stan. Love the “stirred a stubborn mind” idea. Gosh I so admire the concise whirls. You and Walt really master that. I haven’t got a hope in hell; I just blather on and on...

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  19. Madeleine Begun KaneMarch 25, 2013 at 11:58 AM

    Well done, indeed. I especially like: "memories
    that disguised the wound
    of yesterday;"

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  20. J Cosmo NewberyMarch 25, 2013 at 6:36 PM

    Sand castles! Why didn't I think of sand castles? I like it.

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  21. JazzbumpaMarch 25, 2013 at 10:48 PM

    minimalism
    very well done
    i like it.

    Cheers!
    JzN

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  22. flaubertMarch 25, 2013 at 11:20 PM

    Economic and to the point, Stan. Good poem.

    Pamela

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  23. Stan SkiMarch 26, 2013 at 1:31 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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